Sitcoms Are Easy, Life Is Not: it's been awhile....

     It has come to a point here when the only times I write here are when it is late at night when I am away from school and therefore normal life--to put it another way, when I'm feeling reminiscent. You guys last heard from me last April when I wrote an extensive post about my thoughts on the How I Met Your Mother series finale. Though a slight departure from my usual ramblings, it is not without meaning. There have been several other allusions to sitcoms within my writings here, which should tell you all something about myself.
     It has often been a problem that when confronted by turmoil I do one of two things: I either run headlong into it, seeking to take it down like some kind of rabid animal (that is to say, I am too harsh/blunt), OR I turn and walk away. If I can ignore the problem, maybe it will go away. If I retreat maybe the problem will see that I mean it no harm and leave me be. I would like to add here that this is not the case for all matters, but a great deal too many.
     I will return to those issues in a moment, but before I do, I'd like to preface it with some backstory. Since you have last heard from me I have since returned to Multnomah. After my last post in April I stepped into "normal" life which for me meant a normal 5-6 day a week job, leading worship at my home church, meanwhile balancing many relationships I had left behind, as well as those that were right in front of me. It seemed simple enough, but as it would seem, I don't do "normal" life very well. I became bored very quickly. I loved leading worship and I definitely loved having the opportunity to step back into relationships that I had otherwise either not seen fully developed or had nearly left behind. Beyond that I became disillusioned and bored.
     This is an example of me running away. There were good parts, sure, but being on the other side now, I see my mistake. I became tired, relying on the wrong things to get me through. I left school, came home, got a part time job, took up a volunteer position, and had fun, but it wouldn't last. I don't know if it was that I couldn't see or if I refused, but the mistake was in front of me, it happened. I took time off that I assumed would be immensely satisfying, but it wasn't. I was completely and ridiculously exhausted after that semester, but instead of continuing to face the beast, I turned tail and walked away. They say when God closes a door He opens a window, and I'd like to think that is what happened. I left school and the door was closed, but I ended up having the opportunity to lead worship and have some fun; the window was cramped, and eventually I would get through, but it wasn't the best option if given the choice.
     There is a beauty I find in sitcoms and really just television in general that seems to envelop me. You have a small window by which you see these characters, but by the end of that episode the problem is either resolved or very close to resolution. It's so simple; so formulaic. I often claim that I like to look at problems very simply, but I position my life in the most opposite direction. I like to look at life simply, though I seem to put myself in the most complex situations. I want life to be easy, but I don't want to be bored. I want the simple answer, but I've been given the most difficult equation. As I mentioned before, I too often have two responses to my problems, crash into them or walk away. These are very easy answers to very hard problems. Life does not always present itself in simple 1+1=2-esk issues. Life deals in calculus--that is to say, life's problems are not to be dealt with lightly.
 
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     In late August I returned to Multnomah. Everything moved quickly. Within the month of August I decided to leave, put in my two weeks at work, announced I was leaving my church position, discussed the tolls my being gone would have with my then girlfriend, applied back to school, got accepted, and left. Do you know what assuming does? I claim to know, yet it always comes back to bite me in the...butt. See what I did there? Anyway, I left for school with too many assumptions. I assumed I would have a job waiting for me. For nearly a month I had been attempting to work with my current job to transfer to a Portland/Vancouver store so I might simply continue working. I assumed I would be able to transition from a working life back into a life as a student easily. I assumed I would be able to pick up where I left off with all of my friends. I assumed my finances would somehow work themselves out--though this kind of goes with me assuming to have a job. I assumed my relationship wouldn't fall apart.
     Needless to say, nothing went as planned. For nine months I had spent a great deal of time by myself, becoming isolated and introverted. I was more used to being by myself than with people, especially with people my own age, most the people I worked with being decades older than myself. I didn't take this into account. I digress however. When I arrived in Portland, it began to fall apart. Though I thought my job situation would be worked out, I was dropped from the system after only a few emails and even fewer attempts to aid me. Transitioning from simple work to being a student again was anything but easy, especially in the path I had taken. My friends, though they had kept constant contact and invited me in, had continued within their own lives. My finances began to fall apart with student loan companies claiming I owed them money, badgering myself and my great grandmother (who happens to be my loan cosigner) for money even though the error was on their side, not mine; this was not to be aided by my now unemployed status, nor the fact that I had become a commuting student as was driving significant distances every day for school. And the cherry on the top of the ice cream that was my life, after barely a month of me being away, my girlfriend and I parted ways.
     My life was in shambles. I wanted only to distract myself with tv and useless conversations about comic books, but the beast wouldn't remain sated for long. Though I could turn and ignore things like a broken relationship and finances, I couldn't ignore friends, I couldn't ignore school. I would continue to pretend like nothing was wrong, remaining emotionally distant, saying little about what was actually troubling me, only showing signs of wear on the outside.
     I spent the majority of the month of October attempting to hide the fact that though I seemed fine, on the inside I was one sentence or image away from bottoming out again. I don't have a crutch so to speak, I just like to pretend everything is okay. If you smile enough you'll actually start to smile, if you start to laugh eventually you'll actually start laughing; that's what I did. I put on the smile, I laughed at the jokes, I would convince myself I was fine, but the slightest hint of my broken relationship or problems I was having would leave me in a tailspin. The truth is that I spent the majority of the month of October and a great deal of November berating myself and breaking down panicking that things would not end well. This was new for me. Not the berating part, but the panicking. I don't really panic. I'm usually able to take things as they come and move forward, but not this time. Too much was happening all at once. It doesn't seem like much, but I had left myself in a state that did not enable my normal "fight or flight" responses. It is here that the normal lesson learning time begins.
     In retrospect I realize that my previous sentiments about my "last" semester being the hardest was total crap. That semester left me exhausted, sure, but this had left me broken. No contingency plan. No big solution to come up with like usual. There was no easy fix. It wasn't and isn't a "done and done" situation. One of the things that drove my aforementioned girlfriend crazy was that I tried to fix everything. Rather than just let things happen, rather than just sit and listen, I always tried to have a solution. It was "simple." I want to fix the problem, but some problems can't be fixed, they must be experienced. I'm going to sound so incredibly cheesy, but the quote that comes to mind when I say all of this is,

"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt."

Yes, this is a quote straight out of The Fault in Our Stars, written by John Green who just so happens to be one of my favorite people--and no, I couldn't tell anything about the context of the quote, but that isn't important here. The point I am trying to make here is that pain doesn't have an easy cure. It will be felt; it has to be felt. This is a motto that I have fought against almost my entire life. I used to think the world was simple; all the opportunity is out there, it's your job to run to it. There is an extent to which I still believe the latter of that sentiment, though the former has been sufficiently stomped out of me. The world is hard. I get it. Really.
     Thus, I kept going. There was no easy fix, there was no walking away, so I kept pushing forward. I readjusted to life as a student. I even found a job. I have the opportunity of becoming the worship leader for a church in Vancouver. I found my place among my friends again. I stumbled through the remainder of my semester, but I made it. There was a point during which I lost excitement for anything, but even that I got back in the form of several new projects, but that's another topic for another time. I even got some closure on a broken relationship.
     No, I haven't learnt my lesson, I'm still learning. Not all problems have an easy fix. Life is an experience, not a series of math equations. Pray. I know you've all been waiting for me to say that with baited breath. I would not have gotten through any of this without God on my side. I keep saying "I" did this and "I" did that, but though I may feel some modicum of accomplishment for having made it through, I didn't do it alone. The only reason I made it is because God heard those prayers I begged out when panicking and answered them. Though not always in the way I would have liked, my prayers were answered.
     I feel as if this all seems to come from some naive person, so let me set somethings straight. I wasn't some innocent child before this all happened, nor did I think the world "honest." I knew the world to be a cruel place, I knew the problems. I understood there were things that couldn't just be solved, but in my ignorance I failed to believe that there were problems in my own life that I couldn't just fix. I hope you don't read this whole thing as if from the point of view of some sullied child, but from the point of view...of, well, just about anything/anyone else.
     For the last few weeks I have been sitting around during the Christmas break doing basically nothing, which has left me with tons of time to reflect. It's been a hard route, but it's been worth it. I hurt, still, but it'll pass with time. No easy fix. Since April I have remained silent here because I didn't believe I had anything worth saying on here. I wanted anything I posted, if I posted anything again, to have weight, I didn't want it to be something fleeting.
     With all of that said, I have some sincere thank you's to dole out, and don't worry, you most likely already know how thankful I am. First off, thank you so much to my mom for being there to talk or help me out financially, even when I didn't want it. Thank you to my friends who never gave up on me or left when I decided to be a complete a@#, you guys are really awesome. If you are a teacher I had this semester and reading this, thank you so much for passing me, it really means a lot. Really, thank you to any of you who put up with me when I wasn't ready to talk or was otherwise stubborn, thank you for sticking with me.
     So, it's with that I sum things up. Everyone acknowledges that sitcoms aren't a real depiction of life. Sitcom is literally a shortening of "situational comedy," which betrays fleeting. In sitcoms the problems are fleeting (though they can be difficult) and the solutions simple. If everyone acknowledges a fatal flaw such as that in something so popular, why is it we continue to watch them? We want an escape. Sitcoms offer to us what life does not, a complex problem with a simple answer. They are an amalgam of life's problems shoved into a half hour time slot once a week. It is what we wish life was like, but we aren't quite as lucky.
     So it is that I sit here, blasting The Hush Sound through my headphones at 3:43 in the morning on New Years Eve, writing to tell you that 2014 has chewed me up and spit me out. I've bottomed out and somehow gotten up again, but I wouldn't redo a single moment. Life is not a complex problem with a simple answer and I believe in a Savior who will always be there for me. I hope you read this and take something, no matter how small, with you into 2015. It's sure to be a good year.
     In case I don't write anything more for a long time, or ever again, thank you so much for reading and don't forget what I've written. Also, I deeply apologize if this whole thing is completely gibberish, it is almost 4:00 AM. For those of you who are crazy enough to read this so early in the morning I say, "good morning!" but for the rest of you are still sleeping or won't read this for many months to come I say Happy New Year.
     And as usual, thank you for reading :-)

-- Josh

How I Met Your Mother Series Finale: A Few Thoughts....

**WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW**     

     It's over! It's finally over. We wrapped up the finale of How I Met Your Mother with Ted finally meeting the mother (or rather, Tracy McConnell) and a montage of moments from their life eventually ending in her fight and eventual loss against an unknown illness....and so on. Here, now, I just want to discuss a few things I have seen controversy over and at the end I'll give my verdict.
     The first thing I want to talk about is the rise and fall...and rise of the great Barney Stinson. Throughout the whole of season 9 we are present during the weekend of Barney and Robin's wedding. It doesn't seem believable. Barney, the thrill seeking, womanizing, sex-hound and Robin, the traveling, ambitious, emotionally detached reporter are getting married; but we roll with it, cause if How I Met Your Mother has taught us anything it's that...well, just...ok? (Imagine that in Barney's voice and it'll make much more sense) Anyway, everything is chaos through all of season 9. Things go wrong, at one point they can't find Barney, Robin worries about everything...stuff is happening. Throughout the whole episode we occasionally get glimpses of Robin's worries that are valid (as well as the worries of others). Robin realizes that Barney lies and everyone else acknowledging that both of them are very independent people, just to name two of the big ones. Though the lying is resolved in Barney vowing to Robin to always tell her the truth (which we actually get an admittedly sad example of), they are still two very independent people, which they realize; realizing that you are independent and attempting to solve it though are completely different.
     Fast forward three years. Barney and Robin are in Cancun...or Barbados...or somewhere (sorry, I forget....it's late). Once again they're arguing. Robin's career with World Wide News has taken off and they send her to the far reaches of the world to report of various things. Meanwhile, Barney is either left behind or drug along. In this instance he has made his blog a career, but he can't post anything cause he doesn't have wifi. This spurs on an argument that leads Robin to ask if Barney would take an out if one were presented to him. After getting drunk and having married sex (the good kind) and eventually waking up in a haze in someone else's room, Barney responds that because he loves her and wants to be honest he would. Now, obviously that is paraphrasing as that news isn't dropped in the same scene.
     Barney and Robin get divorced. Now, when you get out of a relationship, any relationship, two things happen: you grieve, then you move on. We don't see Barney grieve, but that doesn't mean doesn't, but I won't focus on that. The second step is to move on. When we move on we either try to find what we had again, or revert to who we were before. In this instance Barney reverts to what he knows how to do, i.e. get women. I honestly wouldn't expect any less. It's Barney. Yes, his character development has taken a LONG time to come to fruition, but that doesn't make him stone. If Barney has shown us anything over the years it's that he is broken. I think this is shown especially when Lily confronts him about not changing and he responds that who we all thought he had become just wasn't him. He couldn't, he could never be that person, he was just too far gone. I think what we all expected was that him marrying Robin was an allegory for him being healed finally, but this wasn't the case. You don't fix a broken house with a broken hammer. You don't ask a surgeon with only one arm to perform heart surgery. Robin was just as broken as Barney, and though it would have been great for it to work out, How I Met Your Mother has proven to us time and time again that they are a show that works on real world rules, this means that crap happens. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Barney made it clear, Robin couldn't fix him, he wasn't hers to fix. Ellie was.
     Enter Ellie Stinson. Ellie Stinson is the love child of Barney. She was inadvertently the after effect of his "Perfect Month." "Day 31" as Barney calls her gets pregnant and has a child while the others wait expectantly in the waiting room. When the baby is born, Barney, though very obviously reluctant to see her, goes at the forced insistence of his friends. When he sees her his life is changed forever. You see, I think the flawed premise with the Barney/Robin relationship dynamic was that they were so alike that neither felt the need to change unless absolutely forced, but they both had their own things that could not be changed, i.e. Robin's job and Barney's mentality. For instance, Barney continued to lie to Robin up until their wedding day and Robin remained emotionally cut off unless forced to talk. With Ellie it was different though. Here was this baby that would require all of Barney's attention. He couldn't deny her, he couldn't dump her off on someone else. As soon as he saw her, Barney was forced to irrevocably change. Gone were the nights of sleeping with random women. Gone were the drunken outings with friends. Barney was a single father who had finally fallen hopelessly in love with the one woman who he could not escape nor deny. His daughter.
   
     The next thing I want to talk about is the mother's death and Ted's seeming lack of any emotion. Admittedly, I was also very sideswiped by the the whole mother dying thing. It happened so fast, I wasn't sure what was happening. Ted never explicitly says, "SHE'S DEAD," but rather that she was sick; we later find out that she had been gone for six years by the time of the story starting. This brings me to my point. She's gone and had been for six years.
     Allow me to jump over to something else for a second and then I'll come back. Last year I took a class called Bible Study Methods. It was a fantastic class that at the beginning level only focused on the book of Jonah. Four chapters. Three months. You get the point. Anyway, sometime during this class we discussed "authors intent." Authors intent refers to the ultimate intent of the author. For example, you're reading an old poem in high school english and one of the lines is "the curtains were blue." The teacher begins to go on about how the blue curtains were actually an allusion to the authors troubled and sad life living on the streets of the bronx...when in actuality the author literally meant that the curtains were blue. Authors intent means that above all else, if the author intends for something to mean how they mean it, it means that regardless of what you think. It's a tough law, but it's just so we go with it. Back to the show....
     At the end of the episode we find out that the mother has indeed died and has been gone for six years. Now, I was also disappointed with the lack of emotion displayed on screen by Ted, but ultimately this isn't the story of a broken man who hasn't yet come to grips with the death of his wife. The whole story, beginning in 2005, is told from the point of view of a Ted Mosby who has been without his wife for six years and is ready to move on. What about Robin, you ask? Ted and Robin had been on and off again for a long time before Ted met Tracy. He had come to grips with not being with her though before the wedding, which would be 16 years before the events of the story. For 16 years Ted never pined after Robin. Then his wife died. I'm sure he grieved, come on, it's Ted, but again, the story isn't told by a broken Ted, it's told by a healed Ted ready to move on with his life, which touches on a really important lesson I think this show teaches, but I'll get to that later....

     The last thing I want to talk about, though I have already touched on it, is the eventual pairing of Ted and Robin. I saw one dude comment on a post on the How I Met Your Mother Facebook page saying that Ted had ultimately just returned to the obsessive and overly compulsive guy he had once been with women, giving his heart to them right off the bat and slowly watching as they crushed it in front of him. I don't believe this to be true. Ted married her. The one. He found her. It was destiny. He left during the wedding and went to a train station where he told the story to an old woman who would not keep from pestering him until she eventually point to her and asked if she was the woman in his story. If that's not destiny, I don't know what is.
     Ted tells us in the end that as soon as he saw her he knew he had to love her as much as he could then, he couldn't wait for the future; so he loved her. Through thick and thin, through the times of joy and the times of pain and frustration, he loved her. He would have kept loving her, but she became ill and eventually passed away. You know Ted would've been sad. He knew she was the one. Ted would've cried like a baby, but in the end he would move on, just as he always does. He would've looked pain in the face and focused on what was important. It was no longer his search for a soulmate, it was the kids. Her legacy left behind for him.
     Six years pass before the story we hear is told. Some criticized the finale because they took it as the writers telling us that the whole story voids the Ted/mother search just to tell us that Ted has always loved Robin more than anything else...ever. Again, and I feel like I've said this a lot, but I don't agree. Just because Ted tells his kids the story doesn't mean that it was him asking for permission to ask Robin out, just because Penny (the daughter) says that Ted still has "the hots" for Robin doesn't mean that the story has now come to naught, stories can have dual meanings. Yes, I do believe part of it was that Ted wanted to move on and thus telling his kids the story was a way of sharing this, but I think that the telling of the story would also serve as Ted revealing to them that he has healed enough to tell it, after promising to his own parents so long ago that he would tell his kids everything. The story honors the mother by showing everything that happened that eventually led to her. Every time Ted wanted to give up. Every time he almost ended up with someone else. Every time Ted almost ended up halfway across the country. Everything eventually ended with her. Yet there it is again, she dies and Ted must move on. So I say this, it's not that everything that has happened led to Ted getting together with Robin, the show is called How I Met Your Mother, and Robin is definitely not the mother. It's more that everything that has happened has led to the mother, but when even the worst happens, Ted will always be Ted and move on. Ted will always be the one to make the big gesture (as with the blue french horn). Ted will always love. And lastly, Ted will never dwell on the past because it's the future that is the most important.

     Now for my verdict. I loved every moment. I loved the show since my friends in high school got me into the pilot and I loved it even more when it ended. True, there were problems. I wish they had shown Ted grieving over Tracy, but I know that they wouldn't because it's all being told by a Ted that is past that. Since the beginning How I Met Your Mother has been a show actually for the people. It worked on real world problems and real world solutions. Sometimes things happen, sometimes they don't, but when they do, we must continue moving forward or we're lost. We have to focus on what is really important: friends, family, having fun, love. Nothing is worth doing if you don't have anybody to share it with, which is a lesson shared with us by the most broken of the group, Barney.
     Even within the group each character provides a lesson in and of themselves. Barney is totally broken when we meet him. He's a sex crazed, egotistical, womanizing, scoundrel. Over the course of the 9 seasons we watch him rise up, and then fall, and then rise as he is slowly healed. Every time he rises though it is only temporary as it is only the result of a treated symptom, but then he see's Ellie and shows us that when that one person or moment shows up, even the worst of us can be healed. Marshal is the friend that never gives up. He never gives up on Ted no matter what. He always believes in Lily and even when it's questionable whether or not they would follow Lily to Italy, he ultimately decides to drop his own judgeship and go with her. Marshal is the friend that loves no matter what and shows Ted the whole time what never giving up on love looks like. Robin shows us that no matter what the circumstances, you should always follow your dreams. When we meet Robin she had been in the U.S. for just two months. She had been working for Metro News One as a reporter, though she really only did those "little fluff pieces at the end of the news." Through the course of the show however, she begins to rise. By the end of the series she is a world famous reporter for World Wide News, traveling the world. Yes, problems rise, but she just kept following her dreams and even though she took the solitary path for awhile, even she would end up back with her friends. Lily is kind of a conglomeration of Marshal and Robin. She is full of love and shows us the benefits of believing in people even when it comes at the expense of your own personal gain. However, she also shows us that it is possible to follow our dreams when we might feel otherwise tied down. Through the story she slowly but surely follows her artistic desires and eventually becomes and art consultant for a man known as "The Captain" which leads her, Marshal, and their two kids to Italy for a year. And lastly, Ted. Ted shows us that no matter what the situation, no matter what life throws at us, no matter how down we feel, we should always move forward. Always believe in love. Ted goes through the best and the worst of times in his search for love and eventually finds the end, but only after tripping on every root along the beaten path. He's left at the alter, dates 39 women, get's punched in the face by Barney, get's left multiple times by Robin, but he continues to believe that somewhere out there is the one girl who will solve all of his woes. And she does. Ted shows us that no matter what he must keep our sights on the present and what is to come because when we begin to focus on the past to exclusion of all else, we are lost.
     For some reason, this show has meant a lot to me, and though I'm not quite sure why yet, I feel very sad to see it go. With that said though, I am very pleased with the way it ended. The writing was more real than most sitcoms now or in the past. It worked on a real world basis. I loved every moment, every high and every low. This is a show that made us laugh but also made us think. One of my favorite episodes is still The Time Travelers from season 8 when Ted spends a whole night debating whether or not to go to Robots vs. Wrestlers, talking occasionally to the future selves of him and Barney. Though hilarious in some aspects, it leaves us with Ted talking about how if he had known about the mother sooner, he would've ran to her door and told her everything just to have that extra time with her. It's this kind of writing that we need more of on television. It makes you laugh, but at the same time it leaves you with something more. The whole of How I Met Your Mother was simply "something more." With that, it teaches us that we ought to simply love life, to the exclusion of all else. Sometimes our lives suck, but sometimes they don't and those are the moments we should live for.

-- Josh 

Rock is NOT Against God.

     A few days ago I was listening to "Oceans," a song off of Hillsongs Zion album, and I was absentmindedly scrolling through the comments. As you might suspect, there were some rather "unchristian" comments and commenters to be found. It was not the random anti-Jesus posts amidst the many worshipful posts that surprised me, it was one of the last comments on the page that caught me off guard. I won't be quoting the post here, but it did claim that the arm movements of the singer were of the occultic womb, it grouped catholic and witches together, claimed that her crescendos supported the occultic womb thing, claimed that because of all the symbolism being used they couldn't attribute it to simple coincidence, they said the star of David was the same as a pentagram, and to conclude, they said the circular stage was the equivalent of worshiping the universe...and such.  I wasn't sure what he was going on about....The Hillsong concert at which the video was taken was the Colour Conference at the Sydney Opera House (or so someone else said).
     It wasn't even the obscure cultish claims that I had the biggest problem with,--those left me mostly just confused--it was a claim he (or she) made in the middle about something completely different. They said, "also,  rock and roll is of the devil so this is definitely not a christian song." 
     First off, I must question their logic. What they are saying is that Hillsong, a group formed straight out of a church, is not a Christian group. What? I'm wasn't even sure how to respond. It was the claim before that which bugged me most, however, "rock and roll is of the devil." Now, this claim I sort of understand. I DON'T agree, but I understand it far more than them saying Hillsong were not Christian. 
     After questioning what this guy (girl) was on about, I wanted to do some research. I found a couple of sites that gave me what they thought were their top reasons why "rock and roll" was against God or the rules for ANY music to be Christian. I found verses that "supported" their arguments and "reasons" that stated why rock supported Satan (especially those Christian rockers "who are just deceivers"). 
     My next step was to look up some of these verses. Upon looking these up I noticed one thing, these verses that supposedly supported their arguments did not address music directly, but rather a list of values. It is true that famous "rock stars" don't have a reputation for being the most wholesome of people, but this cannot be attributed to the music. Music DOES have an effect on people, but this effect is specific to the person. People are bad role models, not music. What I found hilarious, was that there happened to be two verses I saw that directly addressed music, but the article I found them in disregarded them as not relevant. 
     So, the verses were inconclusive on the music, what about the reasons? The reasons I found seemed to just reiterate the the same values arguments--which kind of begs the question why didn't I start with the reasons then talk about the verses that supported them (whoops). Some of the reasons I found, and this is an abbreviated list, are these...

1. Rock encourages the use of illegal drugs. 
2. Rock promotes promiscuity and "whoredom." 
3. Rock encourages us not to read our bibles. 
4. Drums are the instrument of Satan. 

Ok, so...what? This is just four of a bunch of reasons I found, and I'm just speechless. There was one reason that included a short bit about how rock promoted false peace that distracted us from a war that God ordained us to win. I digress....My point is that these reasons don't encompass the music, they address the people who play it. Granted, in the past, you have seen these traits exhibited a lot by rock artists, but these are not traits ONLY exhibited by rock musicians. Let's look at the other end of the spectrum: classical music. Classical artists can also do these things. Classical music also uses drums, classical artists also use drugs, and they can also sleep around. The problem isn't the music, it's the people. It's all about people. 
     That's it. When it comes down to it, we only have God to look to, and the bible does not have anything explicitly against rock music. It is people who would rather blame the whole company for the actions of a few people. Rather than putting thought into the actions of people, it would seem easier just to blame their beliefs, but that doesn't make it right. 
     I happen to love rock music, but I tried to take as little bias as I could. I looked up the majority of the verses I was presented with and in conclusion I have only this to say, follow God. When in doubt and in times of trial, look to Jesus. The music you listen to does not necessarily dictate who you are, it only does if you follow the bad examples the music industry has given to us. Why let those standards stay though? I say we ought to show a new face of rock. Let's change the standard. Be honest and Godly people. Allow God to envelop your music, even if it isn't directly Christian allow the Holy Spirit soak your life and His love bleed through. 



*UPDATE* I have no idea why part of the article is highlighted, I've tried to fix it and...I can't, I'm ashamed. I'm sorry guys! 

That TV Show Ending...

     I'm going to begin this post with a metaphorical blunt knife, I love movies and TV. I do. It offers a sort of adventure that we can't really get in our every day lives. We like to live vicariously through these fictional characters. It's fun! TV shows end though. They all seem to end the same way, the characters go their own way, new things happen in their lives and it cuts out with some touching (in the case of sitcoms) or bombastic (in the case of some action/scifi stuff) music. It leaves us to assume that their lives ended the same as ours. When you get down to it, their lives in the show all lead up to this ending. The whole timeline of the show, especially in the case of action/science fiction shows, is leading up to the end and how the whole conflict will be resolved--granted, this rule doesn't always apply to sitcoms until the final season.
     This is where I run into a problem. As actual people, our lives don't really lead up until the end. We basically live day-by-day, sometimes looking and planning into the future. I just finished Battlestar Galactica, a show about this group of humans who loose their planets (this takes place in an alternate universe) and go on the search for Earth, the "lost colony." Obviously, conflicts arise throughout the course of the show, but ultimately the show is leading up until the end when they finally get to stop their search and settle on a new planet (you'll have to watch for yourself to find out where...).
     How do we compensate then? We don't really get a clean ending like a TV show. Our lives go and go and go, all the way up until we die. We don't suddenly start hearing music and everything goes black and credits role with our parents and friends names and such that interacted with us in our lives. NO! We have to keep on rolling along. We don't continuously think about the end though, that's the thing. We live day by day, not really sure of what the end will look like for us, and usually we are too preoccupied living LIFE to stop and think about it; I know that is certainly the case for me. So, what do we do then? The BIG adventure won't usually happen at the end for most of us, it'll happen over the course of our lives, so what do we do? We live life! Have fun while you can. Go on an adventure, whatever that may look like for you. No, this is not a list of things you should do before you get married or a list of dumb things all having to do with that so wrong of phrases "YOLO." This is a calling for you to go out and make your dreams come true. Go have an adventure! Climb through the mountains, travel the Amazon Rainforest, road trip across the US! Do something you've always wanted to because, remember, the adventure isn't at the end, it's happening RIGHT NOW.

Life After Death...And Taxes...

     New background! New format! And last, but certainly not least, a new NAME! Yes, I've changed the name of this blog, and for a very good reason--or, at least I think so.
     As you probably know, I haven't been very active on here for a very long time, over a year, in fact. The reason for that is simple, life got in the way. Before that I would use this blog to chronicle my life (in a way) for you guys to read. I would get on here and write when I got bored or felt particularly spiritual. However, this was before life began to jump up and down screaming, "pay attention to me! Please! PLEASE!" Well, I just had to pay attention, and it's been fantastic!
     In the last year some pretty big things have happened to me and to some of my friends. The last time you heard from me, actually heard from me (no a notice about "Messages from the Flock") was back in May of 2013. I wrote a devotional on...something; I don't quite remember what, but that isn't the point! That was a week before I would spend yet another (my third) summer at camp. Let me tell you about it....
     I went to camp and things immediately kicked into overdrive. Days blended into one another as I entered back into the hectic summer; though this summer would be almost completely different from the last. This summer entered a new relationship, an almost completely new group of friends, new responsibilities, and as always, new kids. It was a rough 3 months, but in some ways it was completely worth the trouble. Though originally only supposed to be the Paintball Supervisor, I ended up also being a Lifeguard, a part-time counselor, and a worship leader. It would be an understatement to say that it was difficult, but that isn't the point. This summer grew stronger friendships than I had ever had at camp, though I loved my friends at camp before also. This summer I made friends that I simply couldn't just leave behind.
     Moving on! Growth. When I came back to school I had left a new girlfriend behind at home, and entered into the most stressful semester of school myself and many of my friends had ever had. As those of you who know me are well aware, I am not the most studious person. I would much rather get hands on experience than sit and read a book or listen to a lecture for hours on end, this is why I love music, as it combines all of it together. Through the semester I began to realize how little I wanted to be there. I loved my friends at school, I loved the education I was receiving, but I needed time off. As the semester wore on, I eventually made the tough decision to leave school for a little bit, to give myself a rest.
     As of December I have officially left Multnomah University for a period of rest. To be honest I've had times where I've regretted the decision, but I believe it still necessary as I've prayed many times and I still feel I made the right choice. If I'm going to pay tens of thousands for an education, I want to be invested in it and get the most out of it. As of now I've returned home for a bit and have begun to help out at my home church as a worship and youth group leader.
   
     Now that we've passed that little story of where I've been, I'd like to explain why I've decided to change the name of this blog. When I started this blog, I wanted it to be an expression of myself. It was a place I could share my thoughts and things I thought people ought to know. With this comes a certain level of growth. From the time I began this blog in January of 2012 to last May, I've personally witnessed growth in my life. Since I'm continuing this blog again, I decided a name change would be a nice way to show some of the growth and that I think I've hit a new stage in my life and walk with God.
     When I started at camp in the summer of 2011 I was given the name "Nintendawg." Though at first thinking it weird, I came to love it, and soon after it sort of became a part of my personality. To put it this way, Nintendawg was synonymous of Josh. Since 2011 I would like to think that I've grown quite a bit, though you guys would have to let me know. I've been at camp for 3 years now and towards the end of this last summer I began to identify less and less with my given camp name. In years past, even when hanging out with close friends from camp, we would still refer to each other by our camp names. This last summer was different. We would often call each other by our parent given names, sometimes even mistakingly in front of campers.
     With all that said, when I came back to this blog, I couldn't easily keep it going under the same moniker. Nintendawg is who I was, and a huge part of who I am today, but the name no longer describes who I AM today. I've grown up. Though I will still answer to it, at camp and off camp, that awkward high school kid is now 20 and in a far better place than he was. It's not who I am anymore.
     The next step was picking a new name. This proved far more difficult then I would have thought....Just for kicks, here are some names I thought up then threw out: "Just Me and This Guitar...," "Once A Musician...," and "The Vinyl Countdown." These names all lacked something to me. The first seemed far too sappy for me; too much like a love song. The second seemed to sentimental, seeming to say that I've given up music, which I definitely have not. The third hit on something and was compared closely with the name I ended up choosing, "Life After Death...And Taxes...." Do you know where they are both from? Yes! They're both Relient K songs. I decided to play them next to each other and decide, and when I did that, the decision was obvious. Whereas one just talks about us not using vinyl records anymore, the other talks about how we are always forgiven, no matter what we do, by the one who forgave before we could even sin.
     There is a part in "Life After Death and Taxes" that says...

"Every breath that I inhale is followed by exhaling,

sure as the one who never fails, I know will never fail me..."

- Relient K

I thought this was brilliant! God will never fail us. Never. There's another part in the song that talks about living every day as if jumping off a cliff because we know that God will be there to save us. Later in that same verse it reminds us that though we all do stupid things, all of us, it doesn't matter because we've already been forgiven by the one who died to save us. As long as we believe that crucial truth, that Jesus came down and died so that we may see Him again, we are forgiven. 

     That is why I chose that as a title for this revamped blog of mine, because this is how I want to live my life. I don't want to wallow in self pity because I am a sinner, I want to acknowledge that Jesus has washed my dirt away and left me gleaming. Sin is death, but with Jesus we are given life after that death. Jesus died to wash our sins away and has left us gleaming with a light only He can bestow, so live like it! Live like everyday you're jumping off a cliff for Him, because Jesus will save you. Try and strive to be like Him and show this light to the world. The world is a dark place, and with Him we are candles in the night. 

     So, with that, I give you a new rendition of my old blog: Life After Death...And Taxes....And as usual...

     Thanks for reading these past 2-ish years!!! 

Life After Death and Taxes (Failure II)

Messages from the Flock: REVIVAL!

Hey guys!

     So, I was checking out another blog and I realized I haven't written in anything in about five months!! Freakin' crazy. I remember back in the day when I was writing multiple blog posts in one day and I thought I was being irritating. Anyway, that's not what I'm here to talk about.
     As many of you remember, last year I began what we called Messages from the Flock. This was a time when anyone could send in posts regarding their spiritual life with God and other people. Last year it was a huge success with about 7 people sending in powerful writings about their own life experiences with God.
     As many of us can attest to, there is an unspoken (get it?) power in someones testimony. The act of recounting our own faults that we have struggled over speaks into the lives of others and calls them out on what they have been or are struggling over now. With this said I want to issue a challenge. Tell us your story. Sit at your computer or your writing desk and write it all out. Send it in! It can be signed or you can remain anonymous, but let us in. Allow others to learn from past mistakes. Let us see if we can't make just a few people better off with the knowledge of those of us who understand what they are going through.
     For those of us who posted last year, I would be happy to accept posts from you, but try to be different. Send in something you didn't last year, and also don't forget to encourage others to send in posts also. So, write it out, type it out, or...something! JUST WRITE!
   
     Ready? This year is going to be fantastic.


     GO!



Contact Info:

Written:
Josh Lewis
MSC #222
8435 NE Glisan St.
Portland, OR 97220

Email:
Odyssey312@gmail.com

My Devotionals.

     "Time with Me cannot be rushed. When you are in a hurry, your mind flitters back and forth between Me and the tasks ahead of you. Push back the demands pressing in on you; create a safe space around you, a haven in which you can rest with Me. I also desire this time of focused attention and I use it to bless you, strengthening and equipping you for the day ahead. Thus, spending time with Me is a wise investment. 

     Bring Me the sacrifice of you precious time. This creates sacred space around you--space permeated with My Presence and My Peace." - Jesus Calling

     I was convicted after reading this latest entry in my devotional earlier tonight. Often I go about my day without stopping to give God my time, knowing that He is always with me and I always have prayer on my side. God understands that our days are busy and that our time is precious, but we should not use take advantage of this understanding. 

     In this busy and corrupt world, any time we can spend with a pure and righteous God is valuable. We shouldn't just pray every now and again though; yes, praying is good, but He wishes that we spend more time with Him, quality time. Any time spent in the presence of God should be worthwhile and not spent thinking about the petty things in life. 

     With all of this said, push back the demands of modern life and just sit down with your Savior. God wants nothing more than to spend time with you so you can share in the joy of his everlasting love. Take some of the time that would otherwise be spent flitting around worrying and rest in His presence. Any time you can use to worry He can use to bless you if you will only let Him. 

God, 

     

     You understand the stresses of this world. You understand that in this world, our time with You can become strained though You do not intend it to be so. Lord, calm our hearts. Let us know that though we ought to set aside time for You, that we can spend every moment in Your love. 

Amen.